"Mom, if a bear wif big sharp teef bites you, you would get bleeds."

"Bleeds? What are bleeds?"

"Bleeds are red stuff inside of your body, kind of like red wava that comes out of a volcano."

"Why is it there?"

"It protects your bwain and your heart. It just fwoats around all inside you. Bleeds are different than boo boos. You need a bag wif ice to make bleeds better and not just a bandage. Boo boos are little and tiny and sometimes they're round. Bleeds are a big deal."

"How do you know all of this?"

"I know everyfing about bleeds. I'm a doctor."